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Distance between hearts

Two Hearts' Distance1

“She’ll always hate me, no matter what I do, There’s no mistake this love is gone”. This song is freaking the hell out of me right now. I can relate to the song after a little fight I had with him and now I have the fear of losing him.

We have fights sometimes, just like normal couples. In the arguments, I lose myself in anger and yell at him. When I’m angry, I lose my ability to think clearly and cognitively. I get infuriated when he either interrupts me or if he doesn’t listen to me or misinterpret me. It freaks the hell out of me.

In our arguments, I yell and get crazy and at the end I ask him to leave. And after he’s gone, I try to calm myself, I understand things better also with a touch of fear to lose him forever. But at least this saves further heated arguments.

Two Hearts' Distance

Today was not different to the aforementioned scenario. We had a fight because he didn’t answer to me when I was questioning him. I lost my calm and obviously asked him to leave. But after he was gone, I became a maniac. We boarded the same train to the way back home. We were in the same compartment of the train, he, at a distance from me, but still in my sight. I was just consonantly looking at him, and wanted him to look at me but he was controlling his anger too. And then he looked at me, we constantly stared each other from the distance, we let out eyes talk that time. My anger was gone. He had to deboard as it was his stop, so we said byes. I get angry at him, soon get filled with immense guilt too. My anger makes me crazy but doesn’t lessen my love for him. I’m glad he understands this. After he left, I couldn’t stop thinking about him or the fight, the distance, the love.

It got me wondering on how odd is this? How quaint this feeling of love is? I accidentally got on this conclusion- the title of this blog.

The distance between two hearts is unfathomable. Contrary to the distance between two places, which can be gauged with the help of tools, scales, anything. Two places will always have a constant distance irrespective of any factor but measuring distance between two hearts can’t just happen. You just can’t measure it. It doesn’t care for the geographical longitudes, latitudes, it’s beyond scientific calculations, beyond the horizon of eyes.

They can be on the opposite ends of the world but still close in each other’s hearts or in the same room totally strangers. Not glancing, not caring of the utter existence.

That is the beauty of Love. No distance can either separate it or can reinforce it. Love is the strangest yet the most beautiful feeling in the world.

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Bangles- symbol of love or colorful handcuffs?

Bangles, colorful, tinted, with the magical tinkling sounds they produce. Who doesn’t love bangles? I know, almost we all do. How beautifully they adorn hands of a woman. They are more than just an ornament in our culture. It’s a married woman’s pride, worn in her husband’s name. Husbands love the sounds, don’t they?

How romantic is the sight of a husband buying colorful bangles for his wife and adorning her hands by slipping the hues into her hands. Bangles are a sign of the love they share, the bond, the relationship they have nurtured.

Everything is transient, so are human lives. What if the wife loses her husband? She becomes a widow. Only a spouse knows how it feels to lose someone they’ve been living with for years, how it must feel to lose their addiction, their part of life, their habit all at once. The Happy-Drug that was there for them every day ever since their matrimony, to listen to them, to help them in chores, to make love to them is forever gone. Every relationship is different but the degree of attachment is the same. They were attached to each other in everything. They couldn’t imagine their lives without the other and now one is alone. Only the Memories last. The loss is irreparable, unacceptable. The sympathetic family is there to try to condole her, shaken, they try their best to help her.

Losing someone physically is one thing, forgetting altogether is another!

The bangles that were the sign of her love, now a memory of her love are suddenly a bug in everyone else’s eye. The woman who’s too lost to even accept the damage is forced by the society to follow the norms made, norms that are too far from normalcy, totally inhumane, driven by blind believes, still existing without a hint of logic. The woman who hasn’t yet shed a tear in the grief, who is numb both physically and mentally. Rather than being given condolences and consoling, everybody eyes her colorful saree and the hues in her hands, and without a second thought, break her bangles by forcefully grabbing her both hands and hit them together. BAM! *Bangles break*

It’s done to the woman who is still unconscious of what is happening around. Some broken pieces even pierce her hand and it bleeds. But few drops of blood can’t draw her attention to herself, when all her mind is focused on the want to just see her husband back.

Why did they do it? Could breaking her bangles make her forget her half-soul? Could it in anyway calm her? No, so why should they do it.

What if the woman doesn’t want to remove her colorful sarees and the bangles? And why should she want so at the first place? The sarees and the bangles are the last symbol of their memories. Yes, these little things have in them, the part of their love’s soul, the things that were with them when they’re making memories in their lives, when they’re living together. The adorable red sarees that her husband gifted her and absolutely loved, and couldn’t keep her eyes off when she would wear them, the bangles in her hand, the tinkling of which always made him a little more in love with her than the last moment. How can she abandon them when they’ve in them her husband’s soul?

Also, she has been wearing them since their marriage, it has somehow become her identity. She wants to wear them. But after losing her spouse, everybody has their own thing to tell her, to shut her up, to impose something on her. They don’t allow her to wear anything colorful, and all her ornaments are snatched. The idea of love and relationship is not anywhere near to the concept that society is trying to indicate.

So only a married woman has the right to dress up, adorn beautiful sarees, bangles, and ornaments. Why can’t a widow still wear them if she wants to?

As per the societal norms, it seems that ‘bangles’ are carefully added to the concept of marriage. They’re not symbol of love as they call it. It’s an identity mark, a carefully placed barrier for a woman, a constant reminder to her and all around. These are nothing but colorful handcuffs that helps her being identified as either a sold or an unsold property.

So are these bangles, a symbol of love or colorful handcuffs?

The bangles that she wore thinking symbol of her love were just for his name’s sake, not their love. Because had they been a symbol of love for the society, no one would force her to remove them after losing the spouse.

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Love should be permanent!

There’s gonna be Million times when I’ll be right, and millions when I’ll be wrong.

But the constant should be you, I can celebrate being right and celebrate being wrong equally proud if it’s you by my side.

If your hands are there to hold me in the times of not just my triumph but my defeat, there’s nothing more that I’m going to ask for.

Because Victory or Defeat, they’re temporary. Love should be permanent!